Chapter 6: Malbec
The following is a work of fiction, and a continuation from the previous posts, Chapters 1-5:
I walked into the house wearing my black dress, and immediately was greeted by a sea of smiling faces. Everywhere I looked, it looked like fake smiles were plastered onto the faces of these strangers. I immediately regretted my decision coming here as I saw there was a dining room table where we would be seated this evening. I had envisioned the evening standing only – standing while drinking my cocktail and standing while I held onto appetizers passed around. I hadn't dared think of how I was going to endure an entire evening seated next to others. With that type of setup, it wasn't as easy for me to make a quick and early exit from the party. I was destined for failure.
"You must be Elizabeth, I'm Sue Ellen and this is my husband John," the woman stretched out her hand with her fake smile plastered across her face. So she and her husband had known her name, contrary to how she addressed their invitation. They looked like lovely and friendly individuals. I turned on the manners that had been engrained in me since I could walk and returned their greeting, "Thank you for inviting me to your home this evening. It's a wonderful place and smells great in the kitchen." I was surprised at how naturally the words had flowed from my lips. Manners were like riding a bike for me. I had met so many important people in my life. But what I said was true. The bungalow I lived in could be eaten up by this place as it must have been about 10 times the size. The walls were modern but mostly bear with only a few black and white photographs. It was a lovely home and I could smell lofting spiced butter coming from the kitchen where I saw someone dressed in a tuxedo walk out of carrying a tray of some sort of appetizers.
"Why thank you, we are enjoying ourselves this summer quite much and are so glad we could have people over to get to know our neighbors," Sue spoke back while nodding at me. Out of the corner of my eye I caught the image of dark hair being tossed over someone's shoulder who was much shorter than the rest of the crowd. She wasn't facing me but I heard that infamous laugh and knew immediately that it was Cindy. I turned my gaze and saw the girl turn and smile as she spoke with an elderly couple in front of her. I was only half listening to Sue and John make small talk in front of me, when I realized it was my turn to move on from the conversation, as they needed to greet new guests who had arrived in the door. I was grateful for the excuse to retreat. I immediately walked over to the area where a bar had been set up and saw my only options were wine and beer. Looks like I was destined for a wine evening, which might have been a good route to take, as I might have drowned in vodka sodas that evening from my nerves alone.
I poured myself a hefty glass of white wine and looked at the small crowd gathered in the living room. I didn't have any ounce of courage or strength to walk over and converse with any of them. I thought of Henry in that moment, and I felt a small smile on my face as I thought that if he had been here, he would already have made friends with at least 3 people and the host, John, would have befriended him and poured him a glass of his finest bourbon. I shook myself of those thoughts and instead caught sight of a door that lead to their back patio. Well, patio was an understatement. It was more of a back grand entrance – two sets of patio tables, a small garden, a swimming pool, and greenery lined this back area. If that weren't enough, there were tall strings of lights that illuminated its entirety. I stood in the threshold of the door to this outside wonderland and heard laughter from inside coming from the ever growing party. I took a sip of my wine and was startled when I heard, "It's pretty cool, huh?" I recognized the voice immediately, and was not the least bit surprised to see her holding a glass of wine in her very own hand as I turned to look at her. I had only met her once, but her presence felt like a breath of fresh air. Maybe it was relief knowing she was such a curious girl and would do majority of the talking. Or maybe it was a relief to escape the world of adulthood and all of the anguish I carried around and instead think back to the girl I was at 15. Or what was it? Gosh, I was a magical and carefree soul filled with so many dreams at that age.
"It is a wonderful backyard," I finally replied to Cindy, returning back to the present conversation rather than letting my thoughts run away.
"By the way, you never introduced yourself the other day," Cindy replied holding out her free hand. She was polite and social. I already liked her character and realized exactly why – she was probably a lot like me at this age.
"That's odd, your mother knew who I was – I assumed you did as well."
"Nope," Cindy replied sweetly.
"Hmmm –" I replied back looking back outside taking another sip of my wine.
"You don't like talking with others do you?" Cindy asked. She probably could sense I was dodging answering the question.
I let out a small sigh as I looked at the girl, collecting my thoughts on how to answer that question.
"I used to like talking with others" was all I could muster.
"What changed?" Cindy asked. So bluntly, so honestly. The true heart of a child.
"Me," I answered and continued with, "Age, time.. being an adult."
Cindy listened but I could tell I hadn't answered the question with what she wanted to know as there was still a look of uncertainty on her face. She slightly nodded before saying, "That's a shame, you look so beautiful in that dress and laughter with others is the best recipe for any party. Well, I guess, I think it's the best recipe for my life."
I suddenly forgot that I was talking with a just a teenager in front of me. How could she speak such wise words at this age? Words that I dreaded to hear but desperately realized were truthful. They were words I had mustered in my 20's. It's strange how some of the most pivotal years of your life, turn into your blurriest memories. That was what the '90's looked like to me. My twenties were the most life changing years, and looking back on them now, I could barely remember them. Yet somehow I was reminded of them talking with this girl, for what had only been a couple minutes.
I nodded at her in agreement with her statement and took another sip of wine while Cindy did the same.
"It's good isn't it?" she sweetly asked and I remembered how surprised I was that she drank wine at all the other day, but now after seeing a more thoughtful glimpse into who she was, it didn't shock me in the least bit.
"It's perfect because the Chardonnay is chilled slightly more than usual on this humid evening," I commented towards Cindy. Somehow those words again seemed to flow naturally from my lips.
"Is Chardonnay your favorite wine?" Cindy asked curiously.
"It's one of my favorites, but not my favorite," I replied already anticipating what her next question might be.
"What is your favorite wine," she asked. My assumption had been correct.
"My absolute favorite wine is a Malbec wine," I immediately answered.
"Malbec? What's that wine? Is it a red wine?"
"It's a red wine from Argentina. Known for it's boldness in unusual flavor," I replied educating her, while I thought back to the first time I drank a Malbec. It had been right after my 21st birthday and Henry had taken me out to a fancy restaurant in my small college town to celebrate "properly." It had been a perfect evening with the combination of drinking and eating too much.
"Sounds wonderful. We should drink it together sometime," Cindy replied. It's something a woman in her early 20's just starting off her career, might have said to one of her girlfriends. Casually and hopefully wanting to try a new type of wine, but needing the courage to do so with another friend. I hesitated not knowing how to answer. It was an invitation and it made me feel completely vulnerable. All I could do was nod as I took another sip of my wine.
"Cindy?" I heard Sue ask. She was looking for her daughter and probably least suspected her to be caught here in the doorway to their backyard talking with me.
Cindy saw her mom and waved to her, acknowledging she would be on her way over.
Cindy looked at me and took a tiny sip of wine, and said, "Duty calls."
I gave her a small smile and said, "Go make others laugh."
"That includes you, don't forget that," and with that, she disappeared back into the room. I sat there for quite some time thinking of how those couple minutes of exchange had stirred part of my soul. I had shut off the world for so long, that in turn, I had shut off the part of my soul that was curious. I used to thirst for knowledge and answers. I was always the kid asking, "why?" growing up. And I wasn't usually ever content or felt settled until I knew the answer. After talking with Cindy, a part of my soul started asking more questions about her life. I tried to shake them and shut them off and venture back to my cave of a world back at my bungalow that evening. I hadn't conversed with anyone other than Mary in so long, that talking with another person like that, even that simple exchange, had stirred my soul.
I walked into the house wearing my black dress, and immediately was greeted by a sea of smiling faces. Everywhere I looked, it looked like fake smiles were plastered onto the faces of these strangers. I immediately regretted my decision coming here as I saw there was a dining room table where we would be seated this evening. I had envisioned the evening standing only – standing while drinking my cocktail and standing while I held onto appetizers passed around. I hadn't dared think of how I was going to endure an entire evening seated next to others. With that type of setup, it wasn't as easy for me to make a quick and early exit from the party. I was destined for failure.
"You must be Elizabeth, I'm Sue Ellen and this is my husband John," the woman stretched out her hand with her fake smile plastered across her face. So she and her husband had known her name, contrary to how she addressed their invitation. They looked like lovely and friendly individuals. I turned on the manners that had been engrained in me since I could walk and returned their greeting, "Thank you for inviting me to your home this evening. It's a wonderful place and smells great in the kitchen." I was surprised at how naturally the words had flowed from my lips. Manners were like riding a bike for me. I had met so many important people in my life. But what I said was true. The bungalow I lived in could be eaten up by this place as it must have been about 10 times the size. The walls were modern but mostly bear with only a few black and white photographs. It was a lovely home and I could smell lofting spiced butter coming from the kitchen where I saw someone dressed in a tuxedo walk out of carrying a tray of some sort of appetizers.
"Why thank you, we are enjoying ourselves this summer quite much and are so glad we could have people over to get to know our neighbors," Sue spoke back while nodding at me. Out of the corner of my eye I caught the image of dark hair being tossed over someone's shoulder who was much shorter than the rest of the crowd. She wasn't facing me but I heard that infamous laugh and knew immediately that it was Cindy. I turned my gaze and saw the girl turn and smile as she spoke with an elderly couple in front of her. I was only half listening to Sue and John make small talk in front of me, when I realized it was my turn to move on from the conversation, as they needed to greet new guests who had arrived in the door. I was grateful for the excuse to retreat. I immediately walked over to the area where a bar had been set up and saw my only options were wine and beer. Looks like I was destined for a wine evening, which might have been a good route to take, as I might have drowned in vodka sodas that evening from my nerves alone.
I poured myself a hefty glass of white wine and looked at the small crowd gathered in the living room. I didn't have any ounce of courage or strength to walk over and converse with any of them. I thought of Henry in that moment, and I felt a small smile on my face as I thought that if he had been here, he would already have made friends with at least 3 people and the host, John, would have befriended him and poured him a glass of his finest bourbon. I shook myself of those thoughts and instead caught sight of a door that lead to their back patio. Well, patio was an understatement. It was more of a back grand entrance – two sets of patio tables, a small garden, a swimming pool, and greenery lined this back area. If that weren't enough, there were tall strings of lights that illuminated its entirety. I stood in the threshold of the door to this outside wonderland and heard laughter from inside coming from the ever growing party. I took a sip of my wine and was startled when I heard, "It's pretty cool, huh?" I recognized the voice immediately, and was not the least bit surprised to see her holding a glass of wine in her very own hand as I turned to look at her. I had only met her once, but her presence felt like a breath of fresh air. Maybe it was relief knowing she was such a curious girl and would do majority of the talking. Or maybe it was a relief to escape the world of adulthood and all of the anguish I carried around and instead think back to the girl I was at 15. Or what was it? Gosh, I was a magical and carefree soul filled with so many dreams at that age.
"It is a wonderful backyard," I finally replied to Cindy, returning back to the present conversation rather than letting my thoughts run away.
"By the way, you never introduced yourself the other day," Cindy replied holding out her free hand. She was polite and social. I already liked her character and realized exactly why – she was probably a lot like me at this age.
"That's odd, your mother knew who I was – I assumed you did as well."
"Nope," Cindy replied sweetly.
"Hmmm –" I replied back looking back outside taking another sip of my wine.
"You don't like talking with others do you?" Cindy asked. She probably could sense I was dodging answering the question.
I let out a small sigh as I looked at the girl, collecting my thoughts on how to answer that question.
"I used to like talking with others" was all I could muster.
"What changed?" Cindy asked. So bluntly, so honestly. The true heart of a child.
"Me," I answered and continued with, "Age, time.. being an adult."
Cindy listened but I could tell I hadn't answered the question with what she wanted to know as there was still a look of uncertainty on her face. She slightly nodded before saying, "That's a shame, you look so beautiful in that dress and laughter with others is the best recipe for any party. Well, I guess, I think it's the best recipe for my life."
I suddenly forgot that I was talking with a just a teenager in front of me. How could she speak such wise words at this age? Words that I dreaded to hear but desperately realized were truthful. They were words I had mustered in my 20's. It's strange how some of the most pivotal years of your life, turn into your blurriest memories. That was what the '90's looked like to me. My twenties were the most life changing years, and looking back on them now, I could barely remember them. Yet somehow I was reminded of them talking with this girl, for what had only been a couple minutes.
I nodded at her in agreement with her statement and took another sip of wine while Cindy did the same.
"It's good isn't it?" she sweetly asked and I remembered how surprised I was that she drank wine at all the other day, but now after seeing a more thoughtful glimpse into who she was, it didn't shock me in the least bit.
"It's perfect because the Chardonnay is chilled slightly more than usual on this humid evening," I commented towards Cindy. Somehow those words again seemed to flow naturally from my lips.
"Is Chardonnay your favorite wine?" Cindy asked curiously.
"It's one of my favorites, but not my favorite," I replied already anticipating what her next question might be.
"What is your favorite wine," she asked. My assumption had been correct.
"My absolute favorite wine is a Malbec wine," I immediately answered.
"Malbec? What's that wine? Is it a red wine?"
"It's a red wine from Argentina. Known for it's boldness in unusual flavor," I replied educating her, while I thought back to the first time I drank a Malbec. It had been right after my 21st birthday and Henry had taken me out to a fancy restaurant in my small college town to celebrate "properly." It had been a perfect evening with the combination of drinking and eating too much.
"Sounds wonderful. We should drink it together sometime," Cindy replied. It's something a woman in her early 20's just starting off her career, might have said to one of her girlfriends. Casually and hopefully wanting to try a new type of wine, but needing the courage to do so with another friend. I hesitated not knowing how to answer. It was an invitation and it made me feel completely vulnerable. All I could do was nod as I took another sip of my wine.
"Cindy?" I heard Sue ask. She was looking for her daughter and probably least suspected her to be caught here in the doorway to their backyard talking with me.
Cindy saw her mom and waved to her, acknowledging she would be on her way over.
Cindy looked at me and took a tiny sip of wine, and said, "Duty calls."
I gave her a small smile and said, "Go make others laugh."
"That includes you, don't forget that," and with that, she disappeared back into the room. I sat there for quite some time thinking of how those couple minutes of exchange had stirred part of my soul. I had shut off the world for so long, that in turn, I had shut off the part of my soul that was curious. I used to thirst for knowledge and answers. I was always the kid asking, "why?" growing up. And I wasn't usually ever content or felt settled until I knew the answer. After talking with Cindy, a part of my soul started asking more questions about her life. I tried to shake them and shut them off and venture back to my cave of a world back at my bungalow that evening. I hadn't conversed with anyone other than Mary in so long, that talking with another person like that, even that simple exchange, had stirred my soul.
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